By Joe Zychik

How to overcome sex addiction. Part 1

The sheer intensity and complexity of the feelings that drive sex addiction are what make overcoming it so difficult - and so rewarding.
Sex addiction is overcome by attacking the problem on two levels. The first level consists of the personal issues that drive the sex addiction. The second level addresses the addictive aspects of using sex as an escape.
The personal issues display themselves through the different forms of sex addiction. Someone addicted to masturbation/porn does not have the same personal problems as someone addicted to prostitutes. A married man sneaking one porn magazine into the house should not take the same approach to his personal issues as a single man obsessed with porn stars.
All the personal issues involved with sex addiction spring from one root: fleeing intimacy. There are different kinds of intimacy. There is intimacy between parent and child, between friends, neighbors, business associates, etc. The intimacy problems involved with sex addiction are overcome by approaching them on an adult level. Conventional, licensed therapy encourages its clients to focus on the traumas of childhood to overcome sex addiction. But sex is a distinctly adult issue. Even people molested as children change as they mature. There are people molested in childhood who do not become addicted to sex. From what Ive observed in helping people overcome sex addiction since 1983, most sexually addicted people have never been molested. Clearly, childhood trauma does not cause sex addiction.

The first lesson in overcoming sex addiction is to treat sex addiction as an adult problem.

Now let's look at the second aspect of overcoming sexual addiction using sex as an escape. Let's start with this definition of addiction, The consistent use of a substance or an activity to escape dealing with uncomfortable feelings. Sex is not the only activity that can be used for escape. Addictive use of work, exercise, or eating is also possible. Substances such as alcohol, drugs, pot, and psychological medication can be used for addictive escape.

The sexually addicted person is not the only one who suffers from his addictive escapes. The partner can suffer more than he does.
In the next part of this series well discuss how the attempt to escape reality causes a substance or activity -such as sex - to become addictive. One final thought to keep in mind: the rewards of dealing with reality far outweigh the temporary high of escape


Joe Zychik is the author of The Most Personal Addiction: How I overcame sex addiction and how anyone canFor more information on overcome sex addiction visit: SexualControl.com
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